Men are claiming they don't "see women as heroes" after a woman sparked an online debate about female role models.
The simple question – "do men have women heroes?" – garnered thousands of responses.
Do men have women heroes?— Jess (@Jess) 1597721948
Some men admitted they don't have women heroes because they see women as "antagonistic to men" or "less likely to do heroic things".
@jesqa_ Straight guys don't... And I'm not saying we don't respect them, but to have as actual heroes?... No. Wome… https://t.co/JTKx4fA7fr— Ya boi Ced (@Ya boi Ced) 1597770598
@jesqa_ Really good question, I actually don't think I have, even if I have some good "female" friends and I guess… https://t.co/ZpdfsCZH0p— Marco (@Marco) 1597795668
Only if they are gay. Straight men are incapable of quantifying women outside of their sexual prowess or attractive… https://t.co/hlFVlIVJly— Mardav Jain (@Mardav Jain) 1597797325
@jesqa_ I don’t want this to come across the wrong way, but part of this is that women who do succeed always talk a… https://t.co/FsLAHTAd5S— Ryan Roach (@Ryan Roach) 1597811195
Other people agreed that whether men admit it or not, they probably don't have women heroes.
Women role models just aren't held up with same reverence and respect as their male counterparts.
I really wish we talked about this more. When a girl looks up to a man as a role model, it's fine. When a boy looks… https://t.co/0IBXBwZx27— Charlotte Clymer 🏳️🌈 (@Charlotte Clymer 🏳️🌈) 1597824218
@jesqa_ No! Men don't have Women Heroes! If they did where are Women Statiums built with tax payer dollars? That fu… https://t.co/n0Gp2840HS— Now It's Our Turn (@Now It's Our Turn) 1597811354
And of the men who did say they have women heroes, a lot pointed to their wife or mother.
Which is lovely... and in some cases backed up with very valid, specific reasons.
But in other cases, men had clearly just reached out for the closest woman to them rather than naming women they actually look up to in the same way they would a male role model.
By doing this, they effectively centred themselves in the conversation – because these women are heroes to them in their roles of wife or mother – which was supposed to be about women heroes.
@StainsbyKingsby @jesqa_ Men always list their wives and mothers. Publicly list beyond that. Cos if the only person… https://t.co/NkIgie0L9Z— 🧣georgia 🧣 (@🧣georgia 🧣) 1597825096
@jesqa_ @KyloReece Ever notice when men protest and say they love women, that women are their heroes, they always d… https://t.co/FDWgDYWAA9— Alisha Grauso (@Alisha Grauso) 1597798746
@jesqa_ Men tend to list women who have personally done things for them (ie their moms) when asked about this.— Kira-Lynn (@Kira-Lynn) 1597758303
Some of the lists were also a little generic.
How many times a day do you actually think about Florence Nightingale?
@jesqa_ Oh gosh...just off the top of my head Gayatri Spivak Rosalind Franklin Harriet Tubman Marie Curie Wilma Man… https://t.co/wO3A7ZlMie— Hyoun Park (박현경) (@Hyoun Park (박현경)) 1597726364
@jesqa_ Absolutely. Florence Nightingale, Mary Shelley, Hilary Clinton, Indira Gandhi, Barbara Castle, Catherine th… https://t.co/Xnb5zEA8nc— Andrew Corbett-Nolan (@Andrew Corbett-Nolan) 1597785288
@WFKARS @jesqa_ Name some. I am all for women heroes. But just to put a blanket statement on it saying most are wom… https://t.co/vqTrikzJhk— Probably Wrong (@Probably Wrong) 1597772396
Go girl, give us nothing!
But some men did name their female role models with touching reasons, so it's not all bad!
If you've spent the duration of this article internally screaming not all men! this section's for you.
@jesqa_ Plenty! Muthulakshmi Reddy, the first non-white elected legislator in the world. Essential in setting up th… https://t.co/F2AsNJiwVM— Kodunthamizhan (@Kodunthamizhan) 1597809244
@jesqa_ Margaret Hamilton, @MIT researcher who developed on-board flight software for @NASA's Apollo program, found… https://t.co/6dqItKBrZK— Erick Pinos | erick.eth (@Erick Pinos | erick.eth) 1597810439
@jesqa_ I think @AOC is the only politician I can trust. https://t.co/QWFLn6qYbq— Endofdaysonmars (@Endofdaysonmars) 1597777793
Other popular choices were Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Maya Angelou, Angela Davies, Jacinda Ardern and queen of everything Dolly Parton.
Many men admitted they'd never really considered whether or not they have women heroes before. And if not, well, then – why not?
The conversation also forced people to question how far we've moved on from the classical ideal of a hero as a daring man with mental cunning and physical prowess.
Equally, it's interesting to ask ourselves whether our conception of what constitutes a role model has real-world implications on who we elect as our leaders: the fact that less than a quarter of parliamentarians worldwide are women and just 16 women heads of state suggests that it might.
Women's achievements throughout history have all too often been overlooked. Let's not add to that by claiming that women can't be heroes to men.