Splitting the bill is always treacherous terrain, especially when it comes to first dates.
In the past, the man was expected to pay for dinner, but such practices are now viewed by many as sexist anachronisms.
That’s not the case for TikTok user Evelyn Gonzalez and scores of her followers, after she admitted to ghosting a guy for not treating her to a meal despite having a perfectly nice evening with him.
Her video, titled “who gonna tell him” racked up more than 94,000 likes and half a million views, with commentators divided on her snubbing of the potential suitor.
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In the clip, Gonzalez told viewers: “Men are so funny I swear to God. So, I went on a date with this guy and when the check came he asked me to split the check with him, to which I responded, ‘yeah sure of course.’ And he was like, ‘you don’t mind?’ And I was like, ‘no of course not. Like why would I mind, like I don’t care.’”
So, she continued, they split the bill – “which was fine” – and went on to have a great rest of the evening before he dropped her off at home.
However, the next day, she said the man texted her asking why she was “ghosting” him and not texting her back, prompting her to roll her eyes at the camera and laugh: “Sir, like, what?
“Baby, I don’t know how to tell you this, I’m not gonna be the one to tell you it, but someone needs to tell this man.”
@e11evyn who gonna tell him 😭😭😭 #dating #relatable #latina #hispanictiktok #spanishtiktok
Gonzalez’s video was met with more than 3,600 comments, with numerous fellow TikTokers agreeing with her approach.
“Instant friend zone. I split the check with my friends,” one wrote.
“I feel like asking to split after you asked me out for a [first] date means you were not into me enough to impress me for a [first] date,” agreed another.
“Haha happened to me last month! If you asked me [on] a date and split, we are friends baby,” added a third.
However, others suggested that it wasn’t just a “friend zone” issue and that men should pay by default.
“I’ve hung out with guy friends that will pick up a tab no hesitation,” one wrote, adding: “Lol there’s boys don’t get it [sic].”
Gonzalez agreed, replying: “Same! my guy friends never let me pay. I only split with my [girlfriends]. AKA besties.”
Meanwhile, other users condemned such attitudes, with one (apparently male) user remarking: “Reminds me of that article about men being unable to date [because] standards are higher.”
“They want to earn equally but not spend equally,” wrote another.
“It funny [sic] they don’t want to go 50/50 when dating but will take 50/50 in the divorce,” said a third.
Interestingly, a 2019 survey of 300,000 Americans conducted by Elite Singles back in July found that men are more likely to think that they should pay for the first date than women are.
When asked “who should pay for a first date”, 62.63 per cent of men said men should pay, while 46 per cent of women agreed.
When it comes to splitting, just seven per cent of men thought they should do so, compared to 18 per cent of women. Similar numbers for both sexes (around 30 per cent) said they "didn’t mind" either way.
Over in the UK, according to a Mastercard survey carried out in 2016, more than half of Brits think couples should split the bill on a first date at a restaurant, while 39 per cent still think the man should pay most or all of the bill.
However, last November, TikToker Kiera Breaugh offered her take on why men should be expected to pick up the tab.
“One of the most insidious and ridiculous effects of the patriarchy is literally women paying 50/50,” Breaugh said in her own video monologue.
“Men going around being like, ‘It’s 2021, equal rights, right? You’re going to pay 50/50,’” she continued. “The fact that men expect 50/50 from women when women don’t get 50 per cent of anything.”
She further claimed that, compared to men, women do not receive 50 per cent of the “money,” “safety,” “privilege,” or “space.”
“But pay, pay equal amounts even though you don’t have equal right,” Breaugh added. “Do you understand how ridiculous that is?”
She then claimed that asking a woman to split the bill on a date is a way for men to “pretend women are equal, before they get equal”.
”It benefits men to say: ‘Oh yeah, I’m a feminist, I believe in women paying 50/50 on dinner dates,’” she explained. “And that is the only time they believe in equality."
“Make his pockets hurt,” she concluded.
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