A popular blogger and OnlyFans star has sparked a fierce debate online after praising her boyfriend for giving his “honest opinion” about her looks.
The commentator, who goes by the name Aella, revealed her partner’s blunt assessment of her appearance in response to a tweet from another content creator.
In her message, @ThePostsOffice wrote: "Being a girl’s boyfriend is all about committing to the bit that she is a 10/10 and the most beautiful woman you have ever seen."
But Aella, a polyamorous former escort, admitted this hadn’t been her experience, replying: “One of my partners once was like 'you're not that pretty' during a tender moment. I rolled over in the fetal position and groaned for like an hour.”
However, she continued: “He went and made me an I'm sorry card out of construction paper and markers and stickers.”
Alongside her tweet were two pictures of the homemade apology letter, in which the man wrote: “I’m sorry I told you you’re not that pretty during a tender moment and that I made you doubt that I ever desired you.
“Before forsaking my cultural wisdom, I should have considered how it would feel and been ready with [kisses].”
one of my partners once was like 'you're not that pretty' during a tender moment\ni rolled over in the fetal position and groaned for like an hour, and then he went and made me an im sorry card out of construction paper and markers and stickers— Aella (@Aella) 1693894328
Aella’s post racked up more than 17.2 million views and 7,100 retweets in a week, as fellow X/Twitter users shared their horror at the partner’s comment.
“If any ‘partner’ of mine said that to me in bed I'd kick them out of the door immediately and never allow them to see me again,” one wrote. “Life is too short to tolerate a ‘lover’ who feels like you're anything less than the prettiest person they've ever seen.”
“Omg he doesn't even say 'sorry for my cruel attempt at humour, you are the most attractive girl I've ever seen',” noted another. “He says 'sorry I forsook my cultural wisdom and told you the truth'... OUCH boy!”
“Where is he getting the idea that this is the objective truth?” asked a third.
A number of commentators reassured Aella that they think she's beautiful@Aella_Girl/Twitter
Aella responded by defending her man (who she's still dating), writing: “To be fair he said it in response to me mourning that [people] are not incentivized to be honest about each other's physical appearances, he was trying to be helpful by giving me his honest opinion since I wanted [people] to be more honest.”
She then added: “He's one of the kindest, most caring men I've dated! He was trying to be honest with me when he thought I really wanted that, he was genuinely trying to help me. I appreciate that and I find the entire event pretty endearing.
“[In my opinion] people who don't say true things out of love because they're afraid of hurting me are more cowardly and I prefer not to date those people. I'm very much a ‘seek out the painful truth and sob’ kind of person both in general and in relationships.”
She then shared a text message the boyfriend sent her in response to the public outcry over his behaviour, in which he wrote that he had “half a mind to [...] include a non-makeup’d photo of [her] and be like ‘look, she is fairly pretty and very attractive and gorgeous when she tries, but that’s different from being effortlessly pretty all the time as some girls in fact are.”
He went on: “Lying injures everyone’s ability to trust truthtelling and the thing where lots of women are deeply insecure about their appearance in an inconsolable way is *built out of* all your lies.”
However, he conceded: “I admit error both in misunderstanding what she was asking for and in offering it without triple-checking first and in offering it without a bunch of support and reassurance prepared in advance.”
Lol idk if it's a good idea to try to explain things to Internet mobs but here's what he texted me this morning (and my included writeup that he references)— Aella (@Aella) 1694027453
Yet, his defence did little to assuage people’s concerns and disapproval.
In a lengthy rebuttal, one commentator pointed out: “Beauty is subjective. Everyone has wildly different tastes and things they find attractive. But he’s applying black-and-white thinking to your beauty and speaking from a place of ‘truth’ (during an intimate moment, no less) when in reality… It’s not *the* truth, because there isn’t one truth for beauty. It’s *his* truth.”
“There are other men who’d be 100 per cent honest, sharing *their* truth, that they find you stunning.”
The woman, called Elle Beecher, continued: “I take major issue when people excuse their careless comments under the guise of ‘truth,’ like they’re some omniscient narrator who can speak from an objective place. You’re ‘not that pretty’ to him. He can’t speak for anyone else.
“My gut reaction is that there are so many men who’d happily fulfil your needs and find you stunning, and tell you that in full honesty… so why date a guy who doesn’t?”
Concluding her monologue, Elle added: “I support you and your choices fully. But this story makes me sad. I understand that you want to be with someone truthful (as do I), but I wonder why that can’t be with someone who says you’re beautiful and means it.”
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