TikTok
Sinead Butler
Apr 06, 2024
TikTok/subwaytakes
You might've heard the term "candid girlfriend" popping up recently on your TikTok feed, it's all to do with a viral video where a comedian coined the term and claimed "all guys in New York" want one.
Comedian Stef Dag (@stefdag) appeared on an episode of Subway Takes (@subwaytakes), where she explained to host Kareem Rahma what she's learned from dating experience in New York City.
“My take is that all guys think they want to date the cool, hot, artsy, baddie girlfriend with like baby bangs and a bad father, but that’s actually not the case at all,” Def explained.
“What all guys in New York want is the ‘candid girlfriend’, you can trademark that.”
She then elaborated: “Candid girlfriend is a girl who is like 5”5 and a half, naturally thin, mousy brown hair no longer than shoulder length. She’s like from New Hampshire and studied art history."
@subwaytakes Episode 104: All guys think that they wanna date the cool, hot, artsy, baddie girl with like baby bangs and a bad father but that’s actually not the case at all. What all guys in New York want to date is the “candid girlfriend.” You can trademark that. feat @Stef Dag Comedy 🎤 @KAREEM RAHMA 🎥 @Anthony DiMieri @Willem Holzer #nyc #newyorkcity #podcast #subway #hottakes #interview #conversations #subwaytakes #dating
“I would say the biggest part of her personality is that she likes pomegranates and her boyfriend thinks that’s so quirky and adorable.”
A candid girlfriend is "never the overt centre of attention" but her boyfriend is always posting film of her on his Instagram Story.
Def also described the candid girlfriend as "patient zero of the pick-me-girl" but added “She is not even trying to be pick-me, she just authentically has nothing in her brain.”
Since sharing her thoughts, the comedian's take has gone viral with 13.2m views, 2.2m likes and thousands of comments from people who wrote the names of celebrities and character who fit into the "candid girlfriend" description.
One person said: "I'm cryingg this is literally Guinevere Beck," referring to the character from season one of Netflix's You.
"No this is so hyper-specific yet I have seen two hundred of these exact people," another person wrote.
Someone else added: "This is FBI level profiling. And not a single lie was said."
"Literally Suki Waterhouse, I love her but tell me she does not fit all the boxes," a fourth person commented.
While Def's comments sparked a debate on whether the comedian's comments were misogynistic or if she was actually criticising the male gaze for how they select these specific women for their aesthetic.
One person said: "It was dripping in internalized misogyny."
"Video reeks of bitterness about a person you don’t actually know and a relationship you aren’t apart of," another person wrote.
While someone else replied: "But the whole point of candid girlfriend is that she’s not actually real, men just fantasize about her."
"She’s literally criticizing the manic pixie dream girl stereotype which men should’ve evolved past by now but it exists in every generation we just call it different things," a fourth person commented.
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