Noel Gallagher's best worst insults

Noel Gallagher isn’t happy with Ed Miliband. Or David Cameron. Or Nigel Farage. The rocker and waspish man of insults has once again made headlines for his characteristically forthright take on the world.

Calling the Labour party a “a f---ing waste of time”, the only person to come out his latest round of tongue-lashing without heavy scarring was, perhaps bizarrely, Margaret Thatcher, who Noel gave a backhanded compliment to: “Thatcher was just like, ‘I’m f**king you in the arse, f--k what you say'. You can kind of respect that.”

Noel is an old hand at this sort of thing, though. Here are his very sweary greatest hits:

He doesn't look like he could be mentally capable of running a corner shop, far less a f--king country.

• On Nigel Farage

… the Conservatives are just… I mean, what the f--k? David Cameron, he’s trying to be your mate. ‘Oh I really like the Jam.’

• On David Cameron

I don’t have a crystal ball. I didn’t see he was going to turn into a c--t.

• On Tony Blair

I did drugs for 18 years and I never got that bad as to say, 'You know what? I think the Kaiser Chiefs are brilliant'.

• On the Kaiser Chiefs

He looks like a f--king balloon with a f--king Weetabix crushed on top. He's better off as a skinhead, isn't he?

• On Wayne Rooney

She can't even chew gum and walk in a straight line, let alone write a book.

• On Victoria Beckham

I would rather drink petrol straight from the nozzle at a garage than listen to an interview with Alex Turner from the Arctic Monkeys.

• On the Arctic Monkeys

I feel sorry for Keane. No matter how hard they try they’ll always be squares. Even if one of them started injecting heroin into his cock people would go ‘Yeah but your dad was a vicar, good night’.

• On Keane

Jack White has just done a song for Coca-Cola. End of. He ceases to be in the club. And he looks like Zorro on doughnuts.

• On Jack White

Play ‘One’, shut the f--k up about Africa

• On U2

I’m sure they’re all nice lads but that’s not for me. They look like f--king Amish people. I need music to be a bit more sexy and played by people who look a bit f--king dangerous.

• On Mumford And Sons

Eminem is a f--king idiot and I find 50 Cent the most distasteful character I have ever crossed in my life.

• Eminem

He’s rude, arrogant, intimidating and lazy. He’s the angriest man you’ll ever meet. He’s like a man with a fork in a world of soup.

• On his brother, Liam

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