Mark Kermode really, really, really hated the new Entourage movie

This afternoon the acerbic film critic Mark Kermode took to his usual slot on Radio 5 to give his thoughts on the new Entourage film. Safe to say, he didn't like it. In fact he despised it.

This is what he opened with:

Well... I mean it's no surprise, I do hate it. I absolutely hate it. I hate it, I loathe it, I despise it, I detest it, I feel contempt for it, I just... everything about it rattles every one of my cages.

In a brutal eight-minute rant Kermode says that the biggest problem he has with the movie is the idea that it is a "male fantasy" - which "is not an excuse" for the portrayal of women in the film.

Kermode admitted that as someone who didn't follow the TV show he didn't have a pre-existing connection with the characters.

It is possible to have movies and TV programmes about people are are utterly loathsome, interested only in money, interested only in cars, interested only in women as property, and for those programmes still to be interesting because of the way in which the programme approaches them. I have heard from some people that there is an element of that in the TV show...

He said that he kept expecting the movie to "flip" and turn into something more interesting than a "pornographic, consumerist, hate filled piece of propaganda," but with no luck.

What you have is a comedy with no jokes, you have satire with no satire. Essentially it's just like the Generation Game with lust, greed, avarice, vice, just being wheeled in front of you and going,'There. That's great, isn't it?'

Kermode even said he wondered if the satire was so biting and deadpan he just wasn't getting the jokes. But no: Entourage is a "foul, soul sucking, horrible vacuum of vile emptiness."

Compared to this, Sex and the City 2 is a call to arms for the dispossessed masses.

Watch the full video below.

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