News
Joanna Taylor
Jun 01, 2020
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You can now almost literally be sent to horny jail for having sex with someone who doesn't live in your household.
New regulations in England specify that it is now illegal to spend the night at someone else's house without a "reasonable excuse".
These include working, moving house, attending funerals, providing care and escaping harm. No provisions have been made for couples who live apart, or people just looking for a good time.
The updated Health Protection Regulations state:
No person may participate in a gathering which takes place in a public or private place outdoors, and consists of more than six persons, or indoors, and consists of two or more persons.
Police can arrest or fine those breaking the rules, with the default fine standing at £100.
This is a major blow for those suffering from 'lockdown horniness'.
People have been coming up with creative ways to work around it.
Meeting up with a romantic partner has been a point of contention since lockdown began, when deputy chief medical officer Jenny Harries told couples to either move in together or not see each other at all.
But that hasn't stopped even high profile figures like Professor Neil Ferguson and Labour MP Rosie Duffield from breaking lockdown to see their partner.
Even Michael Gove may have liked a very NSFW tweet during lockdown.
Prior to these rules, sex with someone from outside your household was also technically prohibited, as you were not allowed to visit other people's houses for any kind of social activity.
But if couples who have been apart for months thought that they might finally get to see each other again as lockdown rules begin to ease, they were sadly mistaken.
The government expects us to go back to work and send our children back to school, but won't let us finally meet up for that long-awaited Tinder date.
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