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Jonathan Pie's rant on 'strong and stable' may be his best yet

Picture:
Picture:
Facebook / Jonathan Pie

If you've been paying attention to the news lately, you may have noticed the words "strong and stable" uttered by the Tories a number of times.

There's a general election campaign going on (FYI), and Theresa May wants you to know that she'll be a strong and stable leader (she's not actually told us how she'll do that though).

In fact during a recent rally, she repeated "strong" 28 times and "stable" 15 times in a 13 minute speech.

It appears comedian Tom Walker [and his ranting newscaster character Jonathan Pie] is challenging her for that title though; successfully saying "strong and stable" 19 times in a 3 and a half minute clip he released this week.

Walker, who is known for his faux news reports and brutally honest politics as Pie, lays into Theresa May in the clip.

The video has been viewed by more than four million on Facebook since it was posted on Sunday.

On her mantra "strong and stable" Pie argues: "problem is it works doesn't it?" Comparing it to the slogans used by the Leave Campaign and Donald Trump, he adds:

"Take back control" "Make America great again" it's on message. Even the Tories don't think we'll be dumb enough to buy "things can only can only get better" cause they can't really.

In the 24 months that Tories had a majority they called for a public debate on the EU that was fought so cynically and appalling that we're now out of the EU.

Shouting "strong and stable" for affect afterwards.

Pie goes on to say Theresa May has "reneged on promises to the Scots" which could "lead to collapse of the UK" and that after Cameron "promised not to resign" he did, leaving us with "Theresa May, a remainer campaigning for hard Brexit". He then discusses allegations about Conservative-funding in the 2015 General Election.

The government is currently being investigated for electoral fraud on a massive scale by multiple police forces covering 29 constituencies meaning they're either incompetent or criminal when it comes to finance. Strong and stable!

He then discusses the EU, the NHS, national debt, and foreign relations.

Strong on the EU - collapsed deal before it even started. That's not strong and stable, that's dangerous and paranoid and cynical.That's playing chicken with the EU to look hard.

Let me just whip-up a diplomatic sh*t storm to win a few votes? Shame on you.

Strong on health? The NHS is f*cked -simply f*cked, whereas six, seven years ago it was in pretty good shape.

Stable on the economy? They've managed to increase the national debt by an impressive £700 billion.

It was weak and desperate how quick she was to jump on Trump's d*ck, you know Merkel did it the classy way, she got ignored by him.

You look weak when you sell arms to Saudi Arabia, who's records on women's rights, gay rights, human rights, is a disgrace. Sorry I forgot who I was talking to there Theresa - not too hot on human rights are you?

Strong and stable on public safety. Closing fire stations, privatising prisons, police numbers down by 14%.

Workers rights? F*ck 'em.

The Tories disdain for the unemployed is  well known, but their open disdain for disabled people disabled people and their carers is a new one for me. 

The comedian then discusses "strong and stable" future for "our children saying that "child poverty is through the roof", and that "education has been cut to the tune of £3 billion," while "child protection services are to be opened up to private firms while abolishing 80 years worth of child protection laws".

How do Tories get away with all this? According to Pie "all good PR":

The Tories recently hired the guy that use to do PR for the Sun. That means the guy that does PR for the Tories is the guy that did PR for the people that use to hack dead children's phones

He adds that people living ion the street has doubled, more people are using food banks than ever and the government have "shut down domestic violence refuge centres, decimated mental health services,and slashed legal aid..."

See the whole foul mouthed and passionate video, below.

More: The lead Brexit negotiator is trolling Theresa May

More: Show this to anyone who thinks Theresa May's offering 'strong and stable leadership' on Brexit

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