Lifestyle
Sinead Butler
Jun 08, 2022
iStockphoto by Getty Images
A woman has revealed the dilemma she finds herself in after discovering that her friend's husband has a profile on a dating app she uses.
In a post on the parent forum Mumsnet, the woman who goes by "Curlyhairdonotcare" sought advice from users as to whether she should directly confront the friend's husband, or if she should tell her friend.
"I seen my friend's husband on Bumble on Friday night," she explained and noted how she "made video screenshot of entire profile" which was "verified and fully filled out."
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She then provided some context as to her friendship with the wife, who she described as being "fairly close" with and was actually at the couple's wedding.
"I was at their wedding four years ago, she was fairly smug with how well their relationship had gone. Engaged after a short period of time, and married after 1 year.
"They met the week after she had a 6-year relationship ending and they did seem literally perfect for each other," she added.
So far, the woman has not told anyone about the dating profile because she tends to "stay away from gossip."
At the end of the post, she asked whether she is being unreasonable [AIBU] to "leave it and feel its none of my business?"
The woman was shocked to she her friend's husband when she was swiping through profiles on dating app BumbleiStockphoto by Getty Images
People on Mumsnet were divided as to what she should do with the information she is sitting on.
Some believe that telling the husband and/or wife wouldn't go down too well, with a couple of people sharing their personal experiences with similar scenarios.
One person said: "I wouldn't tell him! You'll give him time to come up with an excuse. Your loyalty is to her not him!
"Just beware that it can go horribly wrong," another person warned. "I saw one of my friend's husbands on Happn when I was single... ...I told her (the wife) and then got ostracised for causing trouble."
Someone else added: "I wouldn't tell or do anything. Forget you've seen it."
However, there were also plenty of people urging the woman to tell her friend as they would want to know what their husband was up to if they were in the wife's shoes.
One person said: "Tell her. I told a friend, she thanked me, chose to stay with him anyway and I haven't heard from her since. But at least she knew and wasn't being made a fool of, and could make her own decisions."
"If you like and respect her tell her the facts directly. Otherwise, forget the information completely," another person wrote.
Someone else added: "Tell her. I was told and in some ways it was a relief, though terrible."
"Please tell her otherwise she's being betrayed twice," a fourth person commented.
In the comments section, the woman also revealed it was not the first time she saw one of her friend's husbands on the dating app and added: "So it will be the second guy I have seen in their friendship group on Bumble."
"They must think I am some sort of Bumble CIA," she joked.
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