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Becca Monaghan
Nov 23, 2023
New TikTok Test for Healthy Relationships
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A little-known condition could be breaking down your relationship without you even knowing.
Most people are familiar with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), a mental health condition where a person has obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviours.
Now, attention has been turned to ROCD, which stands for "relationship obsessive-compulsive disorder".
It is a newly acknowledged disorder that is fuelled by doubts in a relationship. Those who suffer from it "may experience intrusive thoughts, fears, and anxiety about whether their partner is right for them, whether they are attracted to their partner or their partner is attracted to them, and intense doubt regarding whether they need to end their relationship," according to Gateway OCD.
One clip posted online by Dr Courtney Pare has been viewed over 1.9 million times. She shared several ways the condition may show up in day-to-day life.
She suggested that random doubts such as if you love your partner or whether they love you are indicators of ROCD.
Further hints of ROCD are said to include questioning whether "you should break up with them before they break up with me," or FOMO on potentially missing out on someone else by being in the current relationship.
All are characterised by "if they were 'The One', why would I have these doubts?"
@drcourtneypare Do you relate? 🥺 Relationship OCD involves frequent, distressing obsessions / doubts about one’s feelings toward their partner or the “rightness” of the relationship; leading to compulsive behavior to try to decrease anxiety. #rocd #rocdawareness #ocd #obsessivecompulsivedisorder #relationshipanxiety #anxietycheck #ocdcheck #intrusivethoughts
She went on to explain in the comments that it "can be present in relationship anxiety as well; ROCD involves the presence of compulsions often around checking for certainty about the relationship and their feelings for their partner."
Dr Pare continued: "This can be distressing & exhausting but you CAN have loving, fulfilling relationships without certainty. You’ve got this."
Therapy could be a good option if experiencing such thoughts, as well as monitoring them through a journal. Communicating with friends, family and your partner is also valuable to understand whether there are issues at hand or simply intrusive thoughts.
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